Thursday, November 22, 2012

RE: The Dark Knight Rises, Retrospective Re-Review


Okay, so you mean to tell me Batman's greatest enemy was finding his way out of a hole? First of all, everyone wanted out of the prison, the fact they hadn't done a collaborative effort years ago is beyond reason. Second, how was that rope not long enough? They could've easily modified it with the clothing people shared down there, or, that spare rope they used to uncrack Batman's back. Third, they obviously have cooking utensils, and somehow a cable connection 100 yards underground, and steel cups and what not, but brilliant billionaire survivalist Bear Grylls type motherfucker Batman couldn't figure out how to make a hook and attach it to a rope? Ropes with hooks was easily his expertise. He could've got to the big jump part, told them to cut the rope while standing on the ledge, and easily threw the rope with a hook attached to it over the top to avoid the hard part and just climbed the rope. Forth, even if they had no sharp, hook-like objects, he could've easily filled a bag with stones, like the one he used to break the TV, or broken off some stones from the wall considering his leg was powerful enough to bust bricks. Then, once he got to the ledge part, used the rope as a pulley system to lift the bag filled with his rocks to the ledge, then thrown it over the measly fifteen feet toward certain freedom. Because of this lack of foresight, I'm reducing the movie from my initial score of 9 out of 10 to an updated score of -17 out of infinity symbol.

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