What About BLACK Privilege? - HEIL EMPEROR TRUMP

Last known photo of Stephen Chaplain
The following is a non-racially charged guest contribution by Stephen Chaplain, a mysterious man with a questionable past.

TRUMP IS GONNA MAKE AMERICA GOOD AGAIN. AMERICA HASN'T BE GOOD SINCE COLUMBUS CAME AND RAN THE INDIANS OUT OF IT. COLUMBUS WAS THE BEST PRESIDENT SINCE TRUMP WILL BE, WHEN HE IS. HE SENT THOSE NATIVE AMERICAN HINDUS BACK TO HINDIA AND GOOD RIDDANCE. SO GLAD COLUMBUS DEPORTED THE INDIAN SAVAGES. IT WASN'T "GENOCIDE," HE AND OUR STATESMEN AND FOUNDING FATHERS MADE SURE THEY WERE DEPORTED TO PURGATORY, TO FACE THE SUPREME COURT OF GOD'S JUSTICE.

THIS NATION WAS ONCE GREAT, I WILL ADMIT SLAVERY WAS A BIT OF A KERFUFFLE, BUT OTHER THAN THAT WE BE NOTHING BUT GOOD TO THE NEGRO. INDENTURED SERVITUDE WAS NOT SLAVERY! IT WAS LIKE WORKING AN INTERNSHIP. ONCE LINCOLN --A REPUBLICAN!!-- FREED THE SLAVES RACISM ENDED, THAT IS WHEN AMERICA WAS GREAT. THE ORIENTALS LAID DOWN THE GROUND WORK FOR OUR RAILROAD SYSTEM. YES, THEY WERE DYING A LOT, BUT THAT'S BECAUSE THEY WERE LIKE RAILROAD SOLDIERS WHO DIED FOR THEIR COUNTRY.

WHITES DID NOT FEAR REPRISAL FOR HAVING ENSLAVED, BEATEN, AND RAPED NEGROS. WHITES ONLY UNDERSTOOD THE NEGRO IS INNATELY VIOLENT, ESPECIALLY AFTER SMOKING A MARIJUANA CIGARETTE. WITH THEIR SATANIC JAZZ MUSIC, IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME. THAT'S WHY WE NEEDED DRUG PROHIBITION, CAUSE IT WORKED WELL WITH ALCOHOL. EVENTUALLY THE COLOREDS WANTED MORE AND MORE, WAS "SEPARATE BUT EQUAL" NOT ENOUGH? BUT THESE UPPITY FOLK EXHIBITED THEIR TYPICAL VIOLENT BEHAVIOR BY PEACEFUL PROTEST AND INSPIRING GOOD, CIVIL, LAW-ABIDING/WHITE PEOPLE TO HIT THEM. AS YOU CAN SEE, WHEREVER THE BLACK MAN GO, VIOLENCE FOLLOWS.

CIVIL RIGHTS MADE AMERICA BAD AGAIN. THEN JUST BY COINCIDENCE NIXON CREATED THE WAR ON DRUGS THAT DISPROPROITIONATLY TARGETED THE LOWER CLASS AND MINORITIES. IT'S BECAUSE THE POOR AND MINORITIES ARE DISPROPORTIONATELY EVIL. THANKFULLY WE WAS ABLE TO STRIP A LOT OF THOSE FELONS OF THEIR VOTING RIGHTS, JOB PROSPECTS, AND ACCESS TO GOVERNMENT AID, WHICH ALL HELPED TO MAKE AMERICA BETTER AGAIN. BUT IT HASN'T BEEN ENOUGH.

WHY DOES NO ONE WANNA TALK ABOUT BLACK PRIVILEGE? WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT ONLY BLACKS EVER HAD AN ADVANTAGE IN THIS COUNTRY. AFFIRMATIVE ACTION RING A BELL? WELFARE? THEY GET FREE FOOD AND SHELTER IN PRISON. WHAT'S LEFT FOR US WHITE NATIVE AMERICANS? THE BLACK CEOS HAVE SENT OUR JOBS OVERSEAS TO AFRICA TO SPITE US, AND NOW THERE'S NARY A THING FOR A WHITE MAN TO GAIN ADVANTAGE OVER HIS FELLOW INFERIOR NEIGHBOR. BLACK CEOS CRIPPLED THE MIDDLE CLASS AND WERE BAILED OUT BY OUR MOSTLY AFRICAN-AMERICAN GOVERNMENT. NOW I KNOW THEY LOOK WHITE, BUT WE'RE ALL DESCENDENTS FROM AFRICA SO THE LOGIC CHECKS OUT.

HOW ABOUT THEM MEXICANS? I CAN ALREADY HEAR THE MISGUIDED BEAN-STOCK SAYING, "WELL, IF YOU DIDN'T CREATE A DRUG PROHIBITION SO POWERFUL GANGS OWN THE POLITICIANS IN THIS COUNTRY, MEXICO WOULD BE BETTER OFF," OR "IF AMERICAN POLICY DIDN'T EXPLOIT MEXICAN RESOURCES WE WOULDN'T HAVE TO MOVE THERE" OR "YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TAKEN CALIFORNIA AND THE REST OF OUR COUNTRY." IT'S ALL A PINATA OF NONSENSE. WE NEED TO BUILD A WALL RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE OF EL RIO GRANDE. WE WILL TAKE A CENSUS OF THE ILLEGAL MEXICANS VIA AN ARMED SQUAD, CALLED THE "BEAN-COUNTERS."

NOW IT'S TIME. MAKE AMERICAN GOOD AGAIN, WITH OUR FIRST "LAW AND ORDER" PRESIDENT SINCE NIXON. CRACKDOWN ON THE MUSLIMS. MURDER THE FAMILIES OF TERRORISTS UNTIL THEY LEARN TO BE CIVIL HUMAN BEINGS AGAIN. HEIL TRUMP, THE MASTER OF ECONOMICS AND FOREIGN POLICY, A MAN OF INTRICATE UNDERSTANDING OF HUMAN BEHAVIOR. A HUMBLE MAN FROM HUMBLE BEGINNINGS WHO CARES ABOUT THE COMMON MAN. HE WILL SECURE OUR BORDERS, AND OUR DEMOCRACY, AND SAVE US FROM OURSELVES.

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