This site serves as a creative hobby and a showcase for my hypothetical talents.


Dwight in America is a nuanced episode.

Writing samples

You've seen 'em. The one on pets is pretty good.


Scumbag in Search of Honest Work


I have never been asked a question. Feel free to ask to be put on this F.A.Q.


Chicago, IL

I am nothing, a warm, forgotten Capri-Sun isolated and immersed in desert sand, waiting for another lost spirit to stumble upon me. Because you're a gem in the rough to anyone more in need than you. That's optimism. It's all about perspective. Water is preferable to gold in the right context. One is essential, the other is a shiny object.

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